Miss Alicia Keys!

I absolutely love Alicia Keys, and decided to dedicate a blog entry to her. LOL.
Well if i could i'd marry this woman just because of how talented and amazing she is. Ever since i read her poetry book--->
"Tears for Water"
When i started reading it i noticed we had a lot in common, especially when it comes to writing.
I just hope she doesn't turn into someone superficial.
Alicia Keys is my idol and i hope to be like her one day lol, even though i can't sing or play piano. But hey a girl can dream! I just love everything she stands for.

She's even sexy all G'd up!




Her swagg is so crazy, her sophistication and additude just makes her undefinable..unique.

Mariah Carey.

I've been a Mariah Carey fan since I could even remember. But..recently I just don't like her music...
I loved every album and i do have every album from "Music Box" too "The Emancipation of MiMi"...after that i just stopped because every song is repeating itself and sounds like pop crap... and honestly in the new video with the Dream..she look like a BYRD! yes i said it.. you know why?? NO GROWN WOMAN SHOULD BE WEARING CLOTHES LIKE THAT! Sweety. You're almost in your 40s whats really good with the braids half out and tiny ass shorts and the lolli pop? C'mon.. smh.

ALLL I'M SAYIIINN ISSSSSS....
i miss the old Mariah Carey..before the plastic surgery and botox.

She went from this

*Gorgeous and natural*

to Plastic..=/ i mean she's still pretty but, i liked her as herself..even when her music was natural..but now its plastic like her. =(

Well, she's been replaced by Miss Alicia Keys anyway..

I still love her music...& this happens to be one of my favorite videos.


Always Be My Baby - Mariah Carey



this one too, just cuz i can't decided between both


My All - Mariah Carey

Happy Highlights in the past month. =]

It Started with a Sleepover at the bestie house... When we had our amateur photoshoot in her room lol (hence the white sheeted backdrops)
Then we got into a fight with her 99cent weave.... and the weave won!
My niece Delilah;
New Born Beauty she is as well as an addition to our family. I babysat her for a day and honestly i didnt want to give her back. lol...i really do love babies, especially Her.
So that weekend:
Me and Tye bonded while
Shiyah and my Ty bonded...lol.
It was a cool weekend just maxin in the city actin silly.

SLJ SENIORS! ok so, yeah i might miss some of ya...just some.. regardless we are one big disfunctional family..yeah i said it FAMILY... cuz in the end i cant even front i do love ya'll deep deep deep deep down inside..lol
Class of 2009 =P

I love this Pic of Sammy, geeeezz i'm going to miss her

As for the rest of my chickset...*sigh* The girls i will love forever.

This day was by far the best day i ever had in a long time. & I'm thankful it was with the truest friends i know with the biggest hearts. College is gonna be hard without ya. *tear*

11:42am

I'm in my graphic novel class....with no teacher...and no graphic novel.
So i decide to blog cuz i have alot to get off my chest.
I been patiently waiting for karma to pay me a visit...and maybe by saying this i would evoke it and randomly get shocked by lightning.
I'm feeling 1005039235856 types of ways right now.. and the first one is basically just about life in general.
It's hard sometimes, watching all of your overachieving friends graduate from highschool and going too all these big time private colleges... see me? na... CUNY it is.

Photography dreams might have to be put on hold...but honestly this shyt is killing me.
I want too travel the world and capture images and present them the way i imagine them...

short blog for now..cuz bell bout too ring and i'm out..

Electives & Bullshyt...lol

So today, well yesterday was the first day back from spring break and senior electives started. And personally i feel all the classes are complete bullshyt except for Sex education which is actually useful. I jus want to know why my overcredited ass has to take classes i don't want for unecessary credits? AND all the classes i signed up for i didn't get! Which was a art class nd a film class. Geez..

Well, on another note. I've finally seen my girls today and we had some reallllllllly good laughs. Damn, ima miss them. Ima miss high school to some extent. & as for my boyfriend leaving, I've come too accept the "whatever happens, happens" philosophy. He's decided to got to University of Chicago. I hope all goes well for him. I really do... as for us, we jus gonna enjoy all the time we still have together. He'll always be my bestfriend.

Sensual scribbles.

I'm up...thinking about alot. Alot. Alot of thoughts about him.
Ever missed someone so much you just had this inexplainable heart exploding feeling because you wanted them that bad? Not sexually but physically and mentally needed their presence by you? All i need is his voice...

I just really love this picture...& for some reason it fits the moment i'm in.. well daydreaming of.

Deep bass fills telephonic airwaves to my receptor of air gaze...
staring at fired up skies stretched like elastic across the horizon
the ways our bodies move with the physical interpretation of an eclipse
i your moon try to get closer with out getting burned,bright my life line,
i feel your warmth inching up my right shoulder blade tilting up my neck
sighs,
you sigh seduction
exhaling lust to my peach kissed skin
tracing out a heart followed by I-M-I-S-S-Y-O-U with timid fingertips

laying upon clouds

*SIGH* i'd go in...but i'm trying to keep it PG.

Willie's Workshop =]

Today was an okay kind of day. I had a wonderful start and my feeling kind of sank from there on out. And this song has been on repeat for the whole day and i'm not sure why...It's definitely not my birthday. But hey i won't mind celebrating it again =D!




smh...my birthday would be everyday if someone would sing like that too me.


OHHHHHHHHH so, i went to UDUB today and i mean i'm not the greatest poet but i still love to write. So here's 2 poem's so far since the workshop started:

Mister

Mister muffles wisdom into wasted wishes
Mister wishes wasted while wandering whereabouts get washed for wishing..
times running.
Tickin tockin taking time torturing statistics,
misters' mistaken himself for a false fiction-nary character corresponding to an amateur premature promise to predicaments unsolved unreliable
receiving an unsatisfactory for a grade in life..
misters' failing
misters' failing in perceptions
misters' failing in direction
mister misunderstood the question
mister has no misses
mister don't listen
Mister is missin in missin wishes muffled into wasted wisdom.


Inspired by Suheir Hammads' "What I Will"

I love the hour before take off,
that stretch of no time, no home
but the gray vinyl seats linked like Iraqi children forced to break arms
Will you grab my hand?
Painted in oil as i mistakenly dugg deep into your countries soil
i apologize for it being slippery,
i've noticed every time you reached you'd slide off into an eerie pool
mistaken for mud. Blood.
Staggering along dusty roads of ash with your bare feet. Truckin.
Red footed prints across white sheets of truce. Stained.
Still grab my hand...i'm here to bring peace
to kill terrorist on your grounds that won't terror me
Imprison your brothers and sisters who don't listen,
sticking index fingers in ears they don't like this beat, this percussion madness of bombs and silent gasses
mothers scream like infants infants scream like alarms set off in grade school buildings..
didn't mean to interrupt 2nd period playtime
Just wanted to listen to your music
break the drumming of ignorance with your breath..

Another DOPE SONG that inspires me

Robin Thicke: Dreamworld

really?

Well, today while checking my facebook i got an honestybox message. and it said "Does he really hit you?"......

WTF? HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL NOOOOOOOO! HE DOESNT HIT ME!

Seriously? Why would someone think that? As if I'd let him get away with it as well? NAHHH NICCA YOU LAY A HAND ON ME WE FIGHTIN! Chyll ya, i know how to box..daddy didn't raise a wimp cuz i grew up with a bunch of males in my family.

Anywho...

I love my 2 best friends Squish & Torpedoes. They've made my spring break wonderful so far...especially since i'm boyfriendless...=( for a couple days..

And UMMM yeah they take gorgeous pictures:

Self-esteem BITCHES!

Well yesterday me and my bestfriend had a photoshoot. This time i was a model and she styled me and posed me and BOY did I have a confidence boost. lol 99cent weave can be used in multiple ways. (notice the long big braid isn't actually my real hair).







ANYWHO...

I'm taking a new approach on things, well relationship wise. There would be no biting of the tongue. I censor myself too much and now i feel like my emotions need to be said the moment i feel it. Yeah, well theres not much time left anyway... hmm. In 4 years..? Would we still feel the same? I try not to think about it but i mean hey, this KID is my world, my rock.. i don't want someone to take him. But it might be like Kanye said :

"We weren't meant to be, baby we just happend..."

Yeah, alotta shyt just 'happend' in my life... Regardless I'm greatful for finding a love like this.

2am ramble.. sleep deprived

I can't sleep
Eyes swoll like fresh bee stings too a 6 a year old poking at a bee hive
I cried..na I'm crying as I'm writing..
i got that same sting in my tears so it hurts to let loose and shed pain dripping out the corners of my souls windows.
you would of thought i drowned inside thoughts as pressure elevated in my skull,
The brick wall concreted in wishes, cemented too stay where they are because they'll never go anywhere farther than my mental...i was once called mentally retarted too wish as hard as i did.

I was told to dream,
And that no dream was ever to big enough..
But they lied, well HE LIED, his pockets aren't big enough
& I'm too dumb for scholarships, not poor enough for Financial aid but not rich enough to afford a decent education or at least pursue what i love to do...
So i stay where i always been..stuck in the middle.

Call me selfish, i don't care... all i want(ed) is(was) support.